Venting...

I need to do a little venting. I am editor of the cactus club newsletter - have been since 2007. I think I do a pretty damn good job. I get a lot of compliments, and considering that I don't get much help from members, with the exception of Kathy who used to be editor before me and knows how uncooperative other members are, I come up with 8 pages of content every month. Members should occasionally send along SOMEthing - an article, a suggestion of an article, a website of interest, a photo...they could contribute in so many ways, but I can count the number of times that someone other than Kathy has sent something along to be published. So it's mostly up to me. Oh, and a few years ago, the Des Moines club's editor passed away and they asked if I could make our newsletter a joint newsletter until someone stepped up to take it on. Well, no one ever has, so that pretty much doubled my responsibility. 

Well recently, the CSSA's historian, who is a member of the DM club, has started sending me things to put in the newsletter. Painfully BORING things! The first thing he sent me was a multi-paged "Time Line of CSSA Firsts" which has little quips about people in the past. Just brief facts about people in the past with no bio info that might make it interesting. Like "John Smith was the first club president" - where did he live and president of what club?  It took me nearly a whole year of one page every month to get through the whole thing. Well, he recently sent me a long paragraph about an important figure in the cactus world and some of his memories of him. I was thankful it was ONLY a paragraph, but there was no explanation about who this guys was - it just launched into a comment about him being a Nazi and his interactions with him. I did recognize the name, but had no idea who he was and figured if I, an experienced grower, didn't know who he was, the newbs in the club certainly wouldn't, which makes his ramblings... well, just ramblings. So I prefaced his comments about the guy with a brief bio that I found online. I sent him a copy of the article to get his ok and he came unglued. He did NOT want that bio above his comments. His email was rather nasty, saying things like "Let's get down to the nitty gritty.  Why don't you NOT put anything of my old dead people in your newsletter."  And "You were doing such a nice job before my old history stuff."  He came off sounding like a big narcissistic baby throwing a tantrum.  I can't figure out if he felt the professional bio made his writing sound amateurish (which it kind of dis) or if he's just so egotistical that he thinks HIS account is enough to satisfy the reader.

Anyway, I was rather disgusted by his childish outburst.  He could have been nicer about it, like "I'd rather you just print my comments and leave the bio out."  The man is in his 90s and in hospice (has been for a year) and I guess I shouldn't be too hard on him.  Maybe he's just trying to get his "last hurrah" in, but maybe he could put "being civil and kind" on his bucket list...

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I started this yesterday (Sunday) just before we left to go to the cactus club meeting in Des Moines.  Before we left, this man's son got a call that he's in the hospital.  (I don't want to mention his name because I don't want anyone to google his name and have my vent come up...)  In spite of this bad experience with him, I wish him well, whatever that may be at this point for him.

And one more thing to vent about before I comment about plants.  Since my mom died, I've made it a point to initiate getting together with my sister every couple weeks.  Merry and I are kind of like oil and water, but we stay away from the subjects that cause trouble and we get along for the most part.  If we weren't sisters, she wouldn't be the kind of person I would seek out as a friend, but we're all that's left of our original family and it was Mom's wish for us to stay connected, so we make it work.  And I do love her kids and grandkids, and Rick is a great guy, so... family is good.  

However, every time we get together, the subject turns to diet and fatness.  I am pretty darn fat and Merry is fit.  And she seems to have a real obsession - not just with staying fit, but like a repulsion to anyone who isn't fit.  She goes on and on about what's working for her (please, I've heard it so many times I could recite it in my sleep!), what I might try ("oh, you should do the intermittent fasting"), how Rick could stand to lose a few more pounds, how fat all of his family is, how they have ALL had surgery and then proceeded to gain it all back... and on and on.  When she takes a breath, I change the subject to something else, but pretty soon, it comes back around. It's to the point that I really don't want to hang out with her.  I can't decide if she's trying to be helpful (it's NOT), if she's insulting me, or if she's just plain insensitive.  Not that I'm easily offended.  I know I'm fat and I'm the first person to use the "f" word about myself.  And I'm not opposed to hearing ideas on how to lose weight.  I figure someday, someone might tell me something that will resonate with me.  But Merry talks about the same thing every single time.  It's not like she's offering anything new.  It almost feels like she's trying to tell me, "Hey, you embarrass me!"  And maybe that IS it.  I remember at Brian's HS graduation, Merry pointed at a girl in Brian's class and said, "Brian dated that girl for awhile."  I said, "Oh, it didn't work out?"  She said, "Well, no and I'm glad 'cuz she's kinda fat and, well, he's such a fit guy."  Um, Merry, fatty sitting right next to you here!  Could you BE a little more insensitive?  (And BTW, that girl had a decent figure, one that might once have been called "curvy".  I would have been proud to have her figure in HS - I looked more like a pre-teen boy with my scrawny ass, narrow hips and tiny boobs!)

Anyway, I'm just sick of the dialogue and I think I'm just going to wait for HER to initiate the next meetup (which she never does) and when she does, I will try in a kidding demeanor tell her, "Ok, but NO diet or fat talk!" See if she gets the message.  If I try to talk about it seriously and directly, she'll get all huffy and deny that she always brings it up.  I think I'll do what I used to do with Mark.  He would get so negative and be such a downer, at one point I told him I'm tired of that kind of talk.  It just brings me down.  So, when the conversation starts to go that way, I'm going to knock on the table, which means "knock it off!" That way I didn't have to say anything that would start a whole argument, leaving me feeling even worse...

So to plants.  Wow.  What a great year for... well, everything!  A few weeks ago, at the Men's Garden Club sale, I bought one of Kathy's String of Hearts (Ceropegia woodii).  It had huge leaves!  Of course, the new leaves are much smaller.  I want to figure out how to get them large again!  Usually less light = larger leaves.  Maybe I need to bring it into the house and put it in the north window in the sunroom...

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It has such pretty markings!  And this Ceropegia blooms off and on all year long.  But it's a touchy one.  I've grown it several times over the years and it will go along nicely for awhile then suddenly the leaves will start drying and dropping.  It has to be rebooted often.  But it's worth growing...

One of my favorite Hoyas, juannguolana, which I call juann for short because it is one of the few I can not spell without looking up, has been blooming and putting on new growth.  Very weirdly, I might add!  There are 2 new growth points out of which popped new peduncles, one with a double.  Check it out:

I have never seen a peduncle pop out right at the point of new growth!  It must be something this species does sometimes.  It's doing very well.

All of my H. macgillivrayiis are growing like mad.  The mama plants as well as the for sale plants.  I need to get them on FB to get them sold before they get too big...

H. cv. 'Michelle' bloomed recently.  It turned out Marco's (in Florida) and mine were blooming at the same time!  That's unusual.  And the flowers are very short-lived on that species...

And H. obovata has been blooming.  Even the one in the living room is budding up.  Seems to be a good year for my biggest one as it's vining all over the place!

This is a smallish flower compared to most of them, but it was the only one with a good angle for a photo.  I would have had to be a contortionist to get a photo of one of the other bigger ones!

Oh, we got a big hail storm last Thursday evening.  Wow, was it big hail!  But thankfully, it was either softish or just wasn't that dense because it didn't do a lot of damage to my plants.  My car got nailed pretty good - a lot of dimples on the hood.  And OMG, when it was coming down, I was SO sure it was going to break my roof glass in the GH!!  When the big stuff just started to come down I was outside and I heard glass breaking twice, in the distance.  So someone got glass damage.  That put the fear of God in me!  But it held up.

I'd like to go on, but my back and hip have been screaming at me all day.  I sit down and do a little writing until it becomes unbearable. Up and about.  Then back to it.  It's just not working out.  My appointment with Dr. Jana is another 5 weeks away.  My fingers are crossed that he will tell me it's time to replace this right hip.  It's getting close to being as bad as the other one was by the time I had surgery and it sure happened a lot faster this time!  It'll be late fall or winter before I can get it done - he's always booked out at least 3 months...But that will be perfect.  I'm a little ... this time because I'm alone with no one to help.  I think I'll be ok, but I also think if I do need help, I can probably get Laurie, or maybe Amanda or Liane to help me out.  They could all use the money and I'd be happy to pay them to help me because I'd have to pay anyone else... Thankfully, it's a pretty fast recovery so I won't need help for long...